Ian’s going back to the days of his youth in Pixel Ripped 1989 gameplay! The real world and the video game world of Pixel Ripped gameplay collide in this …


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  1. When happens when you put the Konami Code into Ian's VR Corner? A wild fan fic appears!

    "Ow! Stop it!" Ian sobbed as a pixellated dragon swooped down and shot a fireball at him.

    He aimed his console into the sky, took aim at a very particular part of the dragon's anatomy and blasted it clean out of the sky. "Yeeeeeeeeeees! I roasted your pixellated nut–"

    "Recess is over, pupils. Come inside, or you'll get a caning." Ian's angry teacher stomped towards him. Ian quickly snatched up his peashooter and aimed it at another student's lunch on a nearby table. When he hit the sandwich it exploded into a shower of bacon, lettuce and tomato which covered the teacher. With a shriek, she ran back into the school to get changed.

    "Peashooter? I barely even knew her!" Ian chortled. A couple of his classmates at the next table yelled, "Heyyyyy-ooooo!"

    Meanwhile, inside his console, a complex series of moving platforms appeared, each one topped with a tantalising row of pixels.

    "Must. Get. Pixel. Loot…" Ian was transfixed. He hammered away at the buttons. "It's a good thing I've spent so many years going handheld…" He muttered aloud as he jumped from one platform to the next.

    "Heyyyyy-ooooo!" From the next table.

    "Wait, what? No, I meant with consoles, not with mysel–"

    But then in the game the platform dematerialised under Ian, and his character was sent plummeting to its death. "Nooooooo!" Ian tried a second time. And then a third time. And then a fourth time… After many, many tries, he finally completed the level.

    "Ha! Take that, moving platforms!" Ian punched the air in triumph.

    "Is that why you called it 'Platform32'?" Hissed the teacher, stomping over. "Because it took you 32 tries to beat it? … Come in now for your lessons now, children. I have a cane and I'm not afraid to use it!"

    "I'll give you Platform32!" Ian aimed the peashooter at her face this time. She shrieked as the paper bounced off her horn-rimmed glasses… And then she went on shrieking. Her voice seemed to echo off the walls of the school into a terrible roar. Her body expanded suddenly, and she morphed into Cyblin Lord, atop another winged dragon.

    Cyblin Lord raised one hand, and made all the lunch tables and benches levitate into the sky. They formed a defensive wall behind which he was concealed. Ian took aim at the wall and began to fire on it. His shots turned into bouncing balls. He had to bounce them off a picnic table which he could slide from side-to-side with his controller. When the balls bounced into the wall, they punched holes in Cyblin Lord's defenses, exposing exposing his nemesis. Finally, Ian shot him out of the sky.

    "YES!" Ian crowed. "We don't need no education! … All in all, that was just another brick break game to destroy your wall! … Also, I took you down with my balls," he added. "Tee-hee!"

    "Heyyyyyy-oooooo!" From the next table.

    The End.

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